Spaces

When I was in my 20’s I lived by myself in a lovely studio apartment in San Francisco. It was a great spot. And very comfortable.   I had a cozy bed with big fluffy pillows, hardwood floors, and bay windows – which, if you strained your neck just so, afforded views of the bay… I had my own kitchen and a bathroom with a shower and tub. The closet was huge (one of my favorite things about the place, truth be told). It held a million pairs of shoes, and lots of clothing.

But when I graduated from college I decided to pack what I could fit in a backpack and travel around Europe for several months.  I had this notion that it was important to do this alone, and so I did. I had a very finite (small) amount of money. This meant I spent many nights sleeping on narrow bunk beds in hostels. I shared showers and toilets, and when I woke up I sat bleary-eyed at community tables drinking coffee with other bed headed travelers from various other countries and walks of life. We talked. We became friends. We shared bread, peanut butter, wine and stories. Sometimes it was awkward… But it was also wonderful. Sometimes I slept on trains -- in route to the next town. It saved money *while* traveling. Needless to say, I didn’t have fluffy pillows. Or, my own bathtub. Or, a closet that held a million pairs of shoes. But I couldn’t have felt more alive.

I was thinking about this today. I was thinking about the “spaces” in which we live. It seems we think we need so much. We need square feet, and thread count, and high quality and comfort. But we really don’t. The space that we need (I mean, really NEED) is so very small…

I think this is true in a literal sense, but (more interestingly, perhaps) in a figurative sense as well. The space I’ve been living in (figuratively) is rather small. It is boiled down – condensed. There are not wide open fields. I think this may seem distressing to some. But although my “living space” is compact, it is very economical. I use every square inch of it, and sometimes I can stretch and twist and bring just a bit more space into my day – my life. The thing is, I like the space. A lot. I’ve worked hard for it. It isn’t always comfortable, it certainly isn’t perfect, and at times it’s not too pretty. But it’s the space I inhabit and I choose to love it.